Soft Remembrances
by Neko-Neko Faust VIII
Summary: Kurama's lost love...Is dead, and one night,


Soft Remembrances A/N: Guten Tag, Neko-Neko Faust VIII here again! I do not know... whether it is wise or not to show you this, but this is one of my first fanfics from a long time ago, I think about...a year? This is product of something I call "listening to Evanescence for about 8 hours and then proceeding to watch Serial Experiments Lain..." Hope you like it, I am a truly crappy writer. I don't know if I'll ever write another YYH fanfic though... Disclaimer: I do not own YYH, and I do not own Kurama-Dono, but I do own Helios, and she's mine, so if you use her without permission you might have a fatal accident of some sort! Ja ne! Kurama's brilliant green eyes looked toward the blast of power that was the sunset, he sighed dreamily and stood for a few moments, reveling in its beauty. His senses were in a flurry, all caught up in some magical fantasy like a child, he didn't care though. All of those sleepless nights, helping the Reikai Tantei, all he really wanted...Was peace.

All sunsets are beautiful, but this one caught his eye, a sliver arrow seemed to be hidden among the crimson shine, and the violet mists made it look like Heaven's eye opening just for him...

Kurama walked toward the sun and its mystifying glow, almost faltering and losing his step on the edge of the dusky cliff.

Realizing his carelessness, Kurama slowly pulled himself into cold reality, opening his emerald eyes...

Another spiritual power was there, it hadn't been his falling to the edge of the cliff, but another spiritual energy that was present instead.

"Kurama..."

Kurama looked around, a bead of sweat rolled down his face, a woman's voice called his name...

"Kurama...'"

Before Kurama could ask the voice who it was, he regretted knowing, but the whole personality and memories of that voice came flooding back.

"Helios...?" Kurama asked, bewildered.

"Yes..."

The figure he saw had long silver hair, tied back with a ribbon, and she was wearing a flowing red dress with gold trims around it...She looked so much like a phantom, so dead, but so beautiful, it pained Kurama to look at her...She was like an ice statue...

"It's been so long...But I still remember your face...Not this one, though are you still my Youko Kurama...Who are you now?"

"It's a long story, this is a human body that I reincarnated into, when I was almost killed by a bounty hunter..."

"I can't believe you...Give me some proof that you are the man I loved...Anything..."

"Alright..."

Kurama lightly pulled out a strand of his luxurious crimson hair, but this strand of hair was not crimson...It was silver.

"Is it true...You are Youko? Youko Kurama, the Kitsune Tozoku?" Helios gasped, but sounded relieved.

"Is this proof enough? Yes...I am Youko Kurama..."

"I could never forget you, Kurama Youko...But..." Helios paused. "Why have you left me, Kurama? Do you not even remember?

I waited for you, even in death, but you never rescued me, you lied to me...I trusted you with my soul..."

Helios' voice sounded sorrowful, but her face remained expressionless, like someone who laughs when they are angry. So haunting....She was a stone doll...

"So this is the pain of the to remain without feeling, for an eternity....Yearning to show emotion, and knowing they cannot...It's so strange..." Thought Kurama sadly...

"Kurama, don't feel pain for me, I'm dead, there is nothing you can do...Death is inevitable, it's alright...Please don't be saddened...I chose this path."

"Will you tell me...Why you chose to end your own life? I don't understand, I loved you..." Kurama looked down and blushed. "And...I thought you loved me...." Kurama said sheepishly.

Helios averted her gaze to the yellow moon, her face still the same blank expression, but it seemed so painful for her to explain.

"I couldn't stand it...I just couldn't do it anymore...The wars, raging everywhere, the mothers killed in front of their children, or a child in front of his mother...And the soldier, smiling in his eyes, enjoying the flames...They took so much pride in humanity's dark side, I didn't want to live, to represent a human, to be part of that race...But..." Helios paused, it almost sounded like a gasp..."But...that's not the only reason, Kurama....I missed you, it was like you didn't care that I lived or died, and I couldn't live with knowing that the one person I loved, didn't care for me as I did for them...And when I decided to tell you....for a test to see if you loved me enough, that I was going to kill myself, you left...You didn't care...I hated you!"

"Helios...." Kurama whispered under his breath.

"But why did you come? You sounded so strange when you said I left you...But it's not like that...I didn't...I-"

"Shh...That's all I need to hear...Don't say anymore...But...If it doesn't hurt, what did you do after you left? Did you know of my death? Did you...Forget me?"

Kuramalooked tired...

"It was a hard decision..." Said Kurama looking at the ground, his handsome face in shadow.

"..." Helios was silent.

Kurama's hook his head sadly...

"Knowing either way I would be damned, and knowing that if I picked one choice I would live longer, avoiding going to hell, a delay...And also knowing that, even if I did die with you, we wouldn't go to the same final destination...But, now...I think that...If I had chosen the other one, to be with you, I might have had a chance to..."

Helios' hair blew in the wind, her blue eyes seemingly shaking with an un-classifiable emotion, like a rapture in the wind...

"Kurama..." she said, in a whisper.

Kurama sighed and continued...

"That I might have had a chance to kiss you...again...Just to feel it...One more time..."

Kurama looked up at Helios, a seldom-seen tear trickled down his face.

"I know it seems selfish. But... will you...grant me that wish...even after all I've done to you?"

Helios stared at Kurama... For the first time, in so many centuries...she closed her eyes and smiled at him..He remembered that smile so well, and had longed for it for his entire life since the day he became a human...Though he may not have realized it, this was the one thing he had ever cared for...

"Kurama, I...only remember you as Youko, the Kitsune Tozoku...But I–I don't ever remember you crying over...me...I've also wanted to feel that warm feeling of love again, but...You are..." Helios paused.

"A moron?" Kurama smiled weakly at Helios..."Do you...actually forgive me?"

Helios nodded, "I do. I haven't seen you for so long. It's no use to be angry with you...What good could come out of a petty grudge?"

"Nothing...Nothing, at all." Kurama looked longingly into her eyes.

Their gazes met, and so did their spirits, Kurama walked closer to the edge of the cliff, and Helios drifted into his loving arms.

"Kurama..." Helios whispered into Kurama's ear.

"Helios...you..." Kurama felt himself holding her closely to his body, like a shield, protecting something untouchable and precious...But the strange thing was, he could feel her...He wanted to feel her...Just to know she was actually solid for those few minutes, gave him the satisfaction of feeling love in his dormant heart.

Both of their hearts skipped a beat, and a rhythm was formed, their eyes met once again, confident, and at the same time, so excited and full of ecstasy that they couldn't bear it any longer.

For a splendid moment, their lips met, their bodies unified, both with a common goal. Helios needed his strong caress on her rose of desire, Kurama needed the same of Helios.

They carried on into dusk, filling their long-awaited desires and revealing facades...Their love unstoppable, their kiss eternal...

Unfortunately, the sun rose, in a powder-blue reception of sadness and dreams mixed into one.

Looking into the sky, Kurama made a final decision...

Staring in a strange, bewitched, cheerful way, Kurama looked down into the deep ravine...He knew that if he decided to jump, gravity was going to keep him crashing down into the eternal fall...If he chose not to, without her at his side in life, it would be more hell-like than Hell could ever be.

Kurama took a deep breath, gingerly picked a rose from his hair, and threw it on the ground...Then, he smashed the defenseless, fragile flower with his heel, grinning from some odd pleasure that not even a wise-man could grasp.

"This...Is the end of Shuichi Minamino..." Kurama chuckled and said something under his breath. "And the rebirth of...Youko..."

Kurama's crimson hair began to turn silver, strand by strand, fox ears began to come from his hair, the piercing yellow eyes that saw everything...All of Youko Kurama was returned to its original owner. No bravado facades, nothing, nothing at all was held back, Shuichi Minamino was dead, and Youko...Reborn.

Youko gazed at the sun one last time, laughed merrily, and jumped down the ravine, longing to be with Helios for eternity....

The ravine was dark.... Eternal darkness...No life, no breath, no sanctuary...Just a never ending plunge, into an ever darker place, a place called death.

The End... 


End file.
